Every good thing we attract into our life, including money, comes from self-love and everything we attract into our life we do not want comes from a lack of self-love.
By Frederick Zappone, Life Coach
|.1. Money and Self-Love||.8. Love and the Terrorist|
|.2. Why we need Self-Love||.9. Love All Of Your Emotions|
|.3. The First Step To Genuine Self-Love||.10..Discovering the TRUTH about Love.|
|.4. What does it mean to love yourself sufficiently?||.11. Love is the Antidote to Self-Hate.|
|.5. Experiencing the POWER of LOVE Yourself.||.12. Love Yourself Sufficiently and the MAGIC Begins.|
|.6. Love and Physical Illness (Sickness)||.13. Love and HOT Sex|
|.7. Love Says NO||.14. Love and FEAR|
Everything I know about loving yourself sufficiently that actually works
Money and Self-Love
Regardless of what you think of rich people, study after study shows rich people value themselves more than poor people do...and this self-value started long before the rich became rich.
People rarely think that self-love has anything to do with money but it has everything to do with money. You get paid exactly what you think you are worth and not a penny more.
The more you love, value and appreciate yourself, the more valuable you appear in the eyes of others. As a result of appearing valuable in the eyes of others, you are rewarded with a higher wages and salaries than people who do not value themselves very much.
If you are in business for yourself, you will attract more customers to your business than people who place little or no value on themselves.
It is a simple fact, whatever we focus our attention on, we attract more of them same. If you focus on all the good things money can do for you and your family you are taking the right first step.
On the other hand, If you focus on what's wrong with money or what's wrong with you, you will push money and money making opportunities away from you. You can not attract prosperity to yourself as long as you are criticizing, belittling or putting yourself down in any way.
Love and the Terrorist
Terrorist weren't born terrorists, they were born innocent, made by the same creator who made you and me. The difference between you and a terrorist is the forces that shaped them during their growing up years.
As small children, terrorists experienced brutality, violence and injustice all around them. They witnessed their family and friends being tortured and murdered for no good reason they could understand.
In the mind of a small child, what they experienced as children terrorized them. Those events were the seeds that resulted in young children growing up to become terrorists that now threaten us.
In the mind and heart of a child, these unspeakable acts of terror in their own life filled their hearts with murderous revenge for the pain inflicted upon them as small children.
As these children grew up, the hurt they felt inside themselves blinded them to the fact that the hate they felt for others (people like you and me) is really the hatred they felt for themselves because of being powerless to prevent the people they loved from being tortured and killed.
People who love themselves sufficiently, have no desire to do harm to other people. People who love themselves sufficiently have no desire to control or punish other people. People who love themselves sufficiently only want the best for everyone. They want to see everyone win.
People who love and respect themselves sufficiently, love and respect all others different than themselves. They might not agree with their beliefs but they respect their right to have them and they always look for harmonious and respectful ways to resolve differences of opinion.
I could hate terrorists like so many people do but I do not. You see, in order to hate another, I first must feel the hatred inside my own body. I respect myself too much to allow myself to feel hatred inside myself.
Instead of fearing Terrorists, instead of making them objects of hate, I choose to see them as human beings first. I choose not to get caught up in other people's 'fear hysteria' about how awful terrorists are.
I choose to send terrorists thoughts of love, peace, harmony, cooperation and understanding because, in the end, if we are ever going to have peace on earth, it must begin with me.
Peace on earth begins with peace in my own heart and mind. I could not have that kind of peace until I began loving myself sufficiently.
Why we need Self-Love
We need self-love because we weren't raised up on self-love.
We were taught by the well intentioned adults in our life how to criticize ourselves, belittle ourselves, and put ourselves down. We were taught to doubt our own thoughts and feelings.
We were taught that punishment was the reward for not getting a good report card, doing our homework, chores or not listening to our parents.
Fear was used to motivate and control us, at first in little ways and later on in bigger ways. Our weekly allowance was withheld from us if we didn't listen to our parents. We were also told if we were bad Santa Claus wouldn't bring us anything for Christmas.
We never once thought that being threaten with punishment or having 'love withheld from us' was anything but normal. It is all we knew growing up and had nothing else to compare it to.
The adults in our life didn't do this because they didn't love us, they did this because that's how their parents raised them up because that is how their parents (your grandparents) raised them up. It has been this way ever since the days of Adam and Eve.
The problem is, everything wrong with us, as adults, comes from a lack of self-love. If we don't love and accept ourselves exactly as we are, how can we possibly accept and love others different than ourselves. We can't.
The lack of self-love is the SOURCE of all the lack and scarcity in our lives ranging from the lack of confidence to a lack of health and money.
People who do violence or abuse other people (mentally, emotionally, or physically) lack self-love. People who bully people lack self-love. People who feel insecure, anxious or afraid lack self-love. People experiencing depression or self-mutilate lack self-love. All hurtful behavior is a result of someone not loving themselves sufficiently.
Love All Of Your Emotions
Self-love requires that we quit judging ourselves and love every aspect of ourselves, unconditionally. In the beginning this is not easy to do but with practice, it gets easier and easier to do until it becomes second nature to love yourself always and in all ways.
If you don't love all of your emotions, especially the ones you dislike, you will become the victim of them.
If you don't love all of your emotions, your emotions will take over control of your personality and control you.
If you don't love all of your emotions you will become an emotional REACTIONARY (an emotional terrorist) scaring the daylights out of other people with your uncontrolled display of emotions.
If you do not love all of your emotions, the emotions you do not love, over a period of time, will cause you to hate yourself to the point where suicide will look like a viable option for you.
Hating or disliking anything about yourself is what gives the negatives in your life power over you. The only way to defeat the negatives, in your life, is not by hating them but rather by loving them to death.
If you love to death what you do not like about yourself, you will literally love those undesirable qualities about yourself right out of existence.
The First Step To Genuine Self-Love
The beginning of self-love requires a clean slate and you do that by forgiving yourself for being less than perfect.
You forgive yourself for not being strong enough to stop other people from mistreating you. You forgive yourself for all of your past mistakes, small and large. Your forgive other people for the bad things they did to you so you are released from the painful memories of your past.
You forgive other people for your own sake.
There is no need to forgive people in person, forgiving others is something you do privately inside yourself.
After forgiving yourself and others, you make a commitment to give up GUILT feelings for all time. Guilt is something other people placed on you as a way to control you. Every time you feel guilt and don't let it go, someone from your past is controlling your thoughts and behavior.
The only thing guilt is good for is to guarantee you that you will do 'over and over again' the thing you feel guilty about. When you feel guilt (and you will for awhile until you get into the habit of letting it go) accept it, bless it and let your guilt feelings go by SHIFTING your focus and attention onto people, thoughts and things that make you feel loved.
Forgive means to: 1. grant pardon for an offense ; to absolve; to set free from punishment. 2. to cease to feel resentment against yourself or others.
When you forgive yourself you are set free to create what you want rather than being filled with feelings of resentment, anger, frustration, resistance and dislike.The unwillingness to forgive yourself for being less than perfect makes 'nasty feelings' stick to you like SUPER GLUE.
Discovering the TRUTH about Love.
Like many people, I thought love was a special kind of feeling or an attraction that one person had for another person.
I pursued that type of love for many years only to find out that no matter how wonderful that love was when the relationship started, it never lasted and, often times, the relationship went from bliss to disaster.
Over the years, I never once considered that the love I was seeking in another was a result of not loving myself sufficiently. Not once did I entertain the thought that all great loves begin with great self-love. Not once did I ever consider that the kind of behavior I attracted in another person was always a mirror reflection of how I really felt about myself.
I experienced a lot of pain in my love relationships and learned that PAIN was nature's way of waking me up when I was off-track in my thinking and going in the wrong direction when it came to experiencing the kind of love that was important to me.
It took me years to realize that 90% of the problems in my life, including health and money, were caused by not loving myself sufficiently.
I discovered all of my worries and fears along with my feelings of anxiety and depression were rooted in not loving myself sufficiently. WOW, what an eye opener that was, to discover that 90% of everything that wasn't working in my life was a result of not loving myself sufficiently.
What does it mean to love yourself sufficiently?
Loving yourself sufficiently begins with accepting yourself exactly as you are with all of your strengths and virtues, weaknesses and shortcomings because self-acceptance is the highest form of self-love.
Loving yourself sufficiently means you do not allow people to use or abuse you in any way. It means setting boundaries for yourself so people do not take advantage of your kind and loving nature.
Loving yourself sufficiently means focusing your attention on people, things and events that make you feel good and removing your attention from people, things (including thoughts) that make you feel bad.
Loving yourself sufficiently means never investing your time and energy in trying to change things that are not within your power to change but rather focus your time and energy on the things you can change.
Loving yourself sufficiently is especially important when you catch yourself disliking or hating yourself for any reason. If you don't intervene when you are feeling bad about yourself, you will end up feeling worse.
Love is the Antidote to Self-Hate
One of my greatest personal discoveries is how fast self-love can dissolve anything I hated or disliked. Once I realized I could not hate anything or anyone outside myself without first experiencing the 'hate feelings' inside my own body, it was easy to give up hating things in my life.
I choose not to hate, not because it makes me better than anyone else but because it makes me feel a whole lot better about myself.
When you commit to loving yourself no matter what, it is easy to make the negatives in your life vanish. The best thing about giving up hating yourself and others is that you attract into your life a whole different set of people and circumstances that bless you with so much happiness, prosperity, love and 'good will' that it takes your breath away.
Experiencing the POWER of LOVE Yourself
When you begin to consistently FOCUS on thoughts related to LOVE, you will start to experience yourself feeling safe at all times and under all conditions. You will begin to feel secure in your own thinking and self-doubt will cease being an issue for you.
You will experience yourself connected to the organizing intelligence of the universe, the power behind all things. You will experience, literally, the PRESENCE, the POWER and the INTELLIGENCE of the Divine coursing through your veins.
Your mind will be illuminated (flooded) with insights that will make your life easier for you than you ever imagined possible.
You will begin noticing problems (love, health, money) disappearing from your life for no logical reason you can explain.
You will become very clear about what your purpose in life is and how you can contribute to making world peace a reality.
All the things, mentioned above, will begin happening to you when you consistently focus on thoughts related to love. Those types of thoughts will inspire and encourage you and make you feel powerful in all ways (mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually).
Love and Physical Illness (Sickness)
Illness/Sickness is a LIFE EXPERIENCE, Not a Death Sentence
Did you know that sufficient self-love will make any physical illness that you have in your body, disappear?
Did you know physical illness is weakness leaving the body, if you allow it to leave? If you don't, it will take you with it.
Did you know that feeling guilty that you somehow caused your illness will only make the illness worse? You might have caused it but feeling guilty is the way you punish yourself for causing it rather than forgiving yourself for whatever part you might have played in creating your illness.
Did you know resisting, hating or fighting with your illness only makes the illness have more power over you and causes the illness to get worse?
Did you know hating or disliking your illness is the way you give your power away to your illness causing your illness to get worse for you?
You can either feed illness your power or withdraw your power from your illness and render your illness harmless.
You render your illness harmless by FOCUSING on loving yourself more, by focusing on what makes you feel good and keeping your focus away from those things that make you feel bad.
Illness is the denied fears, of your life, manifesting themselves in your body. Illness is an opportunity to let go of those fears that you have been holding onto in your body, maybe for years,
The ultimate fear is the fear of death. It is the breeding ground of all other fears. Once you have embraced your fear of death, you will become fully ALIVE and everything about your life will get better naturally.
Life is TERMINAL once you accept that, you will discover there is nothing really to fear and everything in life to love, enjoy and appreciate.
Love and HOT Sex
Love creates the urge to merge with another.
It is a very powerful urge because love wants you to be satified sexually, fully satisifed, satiated * in fact.
Love wants you to be satiated because until you are, you will never be able to move beyond physical sex and know love as a POWER, A PRESENCE, AN INTELLIGENCE that lives inside of you.
* Satiated: satisfied, as one's appetite or desire, to the point of boredom.
Sex is not the ultimate experience of love, it is the doorway to the ultimate experience.
The ulimate experience of love is experiencing the Power, the Presence, and the Intelligence of love that lives within you.
You cannot have this experience until you are fully satisfied sexually OR until sex is no longer an issue for you.
In other words, if you channel your sexual energies in creative ways and have no desire for physical sex, you can be a virgin and still experience the Power, the Presence, the Intelligence of love within you.
To be fully satisfied sexually, you must have a sexual relationship with your partner where you surrender sexually to one another.
Surrender will allow you to begin to experience love as a Power, a Presence, an Intelligence that lives within you.
In order to surrender sexually to your partner requires absolute trust. You and your partner must trust each other that, no matter what, you will never harm one another in any way, mentally, emotionally or physically.
The more you love yourself, the easier it will be to love, trust and surrender to another, different than yourself.
The more you love yourself, the easier it will be to experience the Power, the Presence and the Intelligence of love that lives within you and hear the messages of guidance and advice being sent your way.
Love Says NO
Love says NO to anything unlike itself.
Love says NO to fear, doubt and insecurities.
Love says NO to all forms of scarcity and lack.
Love says NO to violence and abuse, including self-abuse.
Love says NO to being treated disrespectfully.
Love says NO to all negative conditions in your life until they no longer exist in your life.
Love says NO to other people's beliefs that put doubt in your mind or make you feel bad in any way.
Love does not deny the negative things in life, it notices them and then focuses on thinking those thoughts and taking those actions that make you and the people in your life feel good, cared for and understood.
Love says NO to all things that do not inspire and empower your life.
Love says NO to focusing on anything that makes you feel less than the magnificent, powerful, lovable to the core person you truly are.
Love and FEAR
Love dissolves all fear.
There is no fear that love cannot dissolve.
Love and FEAR get their power from you.
Whatever you focus your attention on, you give your power too.
Whatever you FOCUS your attention on, you attract more of the same.
Focus on fear related thoughts, people, places and events and you will attract more of those kind of thoughts, people, places and events.
Focus on LOVE related thoughts, people, places and events and you will attract more of those kind of thoughts, people, places and events.
Love is your natural state. When you let go of fear thoughts, feelings of love naturally and effortlessly take their place.
Once you begin loving yourself sufficiently, you will naturally and spontaneously become the master of your thoughts and feelings rather than being a person who is victimized by them.
Once you begin loving yourself sufficiently, you will find yourself, effortlessly, attracting opportunities you could never otherwise attract.
Once you begin loving yourself sufficiently, your fears will begin disappearing for no logical reason you can explain.
Once you begin loving yourself sufficiently, other people's approval of what you say and do will no longer be important to you.
Once you begin loving yourself sufficiently, accepting and approving of yourself, exactly as I are, will be easy to do.
Once you begin loving yourself sufficiently, your mind will quiet down, the victim chatter will end, and you will be content being the powerful person you truly are rather than struggling to be someone you are not.
Once you begin loving yourself sufficiently, the people and events outside of you will change, in ways that will seem magical to you, to reflect the changes you made on the inside of you.
HOW TO LOVE YOURSELF SUFFICIENTLY
Everything I know about loving yourself sufficiently that actually works
When everything in life failed me. When my beliefs failed me. When the medical profession and my religion failed me. When the people, in my life, let me down and disappointed me. When I felt all alone and completely misunderstood, it was love that turned my life around.
Once I started loving myself sufficiently, the things that weren't working in my life started working for no logical reason I could explain other than the fact that I was taking the time to love myself sufficiently.
Everything I learned, over a period of twenty years, about loving myself sufficiently I put into a program I called Thought MASTERY.
I call it Thought Mastery because once you become a master at consistently thinking thoughts of love in regards to all people and all situations, your life will be the unfolding of one miracle after another. These miracles will, literally, move you to tears.
In my program, I explain in detail, using real life examples and analogies, exactly what it takes to love yourself sufficiently so good things begin happening in your life naturally and effortlessly.
My program is delivered to you over a period of 21 days. It is sent to you in bite size chunks so the information in my program is easy to understand and apply to your daily life. .- Frederick Zappone
The Thought MASTERY Program
teaches you the EASY way to love yourself exactly as you are. As a result of loving yourself sufficiently, the things you have been trying to achieve or change in your life will happen effortlessly and naturally.
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3. You don't believe in the transformative power of self-love.
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